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These beers may be a bit stale, but they sure taste authentic anyway...
DOS beer:
You must use your own can opener, and all opening instruction are to be read carefully.
Has earlier been delivered in packs of eight cans. Nowadays you get it in packs of 16 cans which must be shipped in two seperate packs of eight. Otherwise the packaging wouldn't stand the shipping. Soon the production of this beer will be cancelled, but private stocks are that big it will be still drunk for a long time to go.
MAC beer:
Has earlier been shipped in packs of 16, but is now available in packs of 32, too. This so-called diet beer openes instantly after taking it from the fridge. The contents are not give. If you ask for them, you only get to know that you don't need to know about them. Still there is a sticker saying "Please recycle empty can" on the can.
Windows 3.x beer:
Probably the best know beer on the market. It looks a little like MAC beer, but it is shipped in packs of 16 only. Moreover, one can only drink it if one has had an initial DOS beer. You can drink both DOS and Windows beers at a time,
if you drink just a few DOS beers and this slowly. Sometimes a Windows beer can explodes when trying to open it.
OS/2 beer:
Is shipped in packs of 32. You can drink several of them at a time.
You can even combine it several DOS or Windows beers in whatever constellation. This beer won't explode even if you shake it before opening it. Its manufacturer IBM (International Beer Manufacturing) states that more than 10 million cans have been sold. Some die-hard drinkers has grouped to form the TeamOS/2 beer club. This was done in order to bring OS/2's new flavour WARP ("Wery a real peer;) to the drinking people.
Windows95 beer:
The latest beer on the market. Some test drinker really like its taste. Actually it looks like a mix of OS/2 and MAC beer, but tastes more like Windows 3.x beer. Is shipped in packs of 32, which but contain only packs of 16.
The average beer drinker will probably stick to Windows 3.x beer, until he meets friends in a pub who liked the flavour of the new beer. Its manufacturer MS (Multi-Sip) states that this beer is something revolutionarily new.
Truth has it that you will find traces of MAC-, OS/2
and DOS beers in the small printed contents list.
Windows NT beer:
Is shipped in packs of 32 only, but need a huge fridge to keep it as only big values are sold. Looks like Windows 3.x beer, but the manufacturer will adapt it to the looks of Windows95 beer anpassen, if this is sold well. It's sold as industrial strong beer and should only be available at qualified bars.
UNIX beer:
You can buy Unix Bier in all imaginable amounts. There is a range from packs of eight up to packs of 64, the taste of all of which is quite similar. Drinkers of UNIX beer are very loyal to their brand. Sometimes you need a can opener as the opening ring sometimes comes off. If this happens one needs experience of a friend who has been an experienced drinker of UNIX beer or years to get it open.
AmigaDOS beer:
The original producer has closed down, but a German brewery took over the recipe for export. It has never been a success which has to be blamed at the marketing. Just like drinkers of UNIX beer, drinkers of AmigaDOS are quite a loyal bunch of drinkers. It is sold in packs of 16 as well as in packs of 32 lately. When introduced to the market it seems a colourful and rich beer, but its design has never been changed. Thus some think it taste a bit stale. Critics say, one can only drink it when watching TV. |
